The opening weekend of the playoffs definitely delivered on excitement and drama. San Diego imploded. Tom Brady went home. The Vikings got exposed. The Seahawks reminded us that they didn’t belong in the playoffs to begin with.

Most importantly, our predictions based on the zodiac sign of the starting QB got 4 out of 6 right. Even that is misleading, however, since Dak Prescott is a Leo like Tom Brady. Tom Brady just didn’t bring that Leo energy for some reason. Here’s the picks for the NFL Divisional Playoff Round.

Chiefs vs Jaguars

Trevor Lawrence and the Jaguars looked like their playoff lives weren’t long for this world. Lawrence seemed more interested in throwing the ball to Chargers than to his own receivers, while the Jags defense was barely more useful than pylons. Then the turntables turned and Trevor Lawrence was unstoppable and the Jags defense was the 85 Bears reborn. Pretty wild for a Libra.

The Chiefs are the same offensive juggernaut that they’ve been for a few years now. Patrick Mahomes is arguably the best quarterback in the league. Travis Kelce is the best receiving tight end in NFL history. They’re basically Brady and Gronk, but more fun.

Lawrence’s very Libra-like inconsistency doesn’t have a ton of chance against the smarts of a Virgo like Mahomes. Chiefs will win this one.

Eagles vs Giants

The Giants are as mediocre as they come. They’re not bad, but there’s nothing they do exceptionally well. Even their quarterback, Daniel Jones, just sounds like the most bland person alive. Perfect for a Gemini. That said, they managed to beat the Vikings, who spent all season demanding respect only to fall on their face when it mattered. 

Philadelphia, on the other hand, is not mediocre or boring. TJ Edwards anchors a stout defense that likes blowing up running backs. Miles Sanders provides a real running threat to compliment Jalen Hurts. Hurts came into the league with a chip on his shoulder about his 2nd round pick status, and the past two years he’s making sure the league knows about it. How very Leo of him.

Jones is still a Gemini and lightning isn’t going to strike twice for him. On the other side is a Leo among Leos with something to prove. Eagles are gonna fly over the Giants.

Bengals vs Bills

The Bengals vs Ravens definitely lived up to expectations and more. The expectations were Joe Burrow and the Bengals offense vs the Ravens defense putting on a show, which they did. The impressive thing was Burrow not turning the ball over. The “and more” of this game was it being won on a 98-yard fumble return. Not even Jesus saw that one coming.

Josh Allen and the Bills did what they should do against Miami. In fact, it really looks like no one is going to be able to touch the Bills. The Bengals will definitely be a real test.

In the end, however, a tough Taurus like Allen is always up for a challenge. Even more than a Sagittarius like Burrow. The Bills will beat the Bengals. 

49ers vs Cowboys

Going into last week, Tom Brady had as many playoff wins as the entire Dallas Cowboys franchise. Now, the Cowboys are up by 1 after the real surprise of the weekend. It wasn’t a surprise because Tampa Bay has a good football team. They don’t. They just have Brady and the devil magic he commands in the playoffs. Dak Prescott was not intimidated.

In the NFC West showdown between San Francisco and Seattle, the 49ers proved what little business the Seahawks had in the playoffs this year. Their defense didn’t let Geno Smith breathe and Brock Purdy made a real statement. Not something timid Capricorns are known for.

Last week we doubted Prescott’s credentials as a Leo, and that’s not a mistake we’ll make again. Purdy may have burst on to the scene, but Leos aren’t easily intimidated. Cowboys will come out on top over the 49ers.